Talking in Circles

I miss my students. I haven’t taught a class since January 17 and it’s really starting to hit home that I taught my last language camp without even knowing it.

I counted out in my head the time I have left in Korea and it came as a gentle surprise to find that in less than four and a half months I will head to Seoul for the last time and board another one way flight. As though time has been sneaking up on me and I didn’t even realize it. Instead I had been focusing on the day-to-day, trying to find a way to remember each one individually. A challenge when one day blurs into the next with very little happening.

I woke up today, unsure that it was really Saturday. In my planner, I wrote that I wanted to finish my syllabus project that is due next weekend. But when I cracked my eyes open at 9:30 this morning, I thought that perhaps I can just do it tomorrow. Or any of the subsequent days this week, since I am off from work until May 7th. I will use this time to finish these assignments. To write my research paper. To study German. To read the books I have in my apartment so I can say goodbye to them as I pass them onto someone else.

I’ve entered the in-between. Or perhaps I have been in the in-between since I returned from Bali in February. It is hard to believe how much time has passed since I returned from that trip, not realizing it would be the last one I take while living in Korea.

The next adventure awaits, yet seems so far off. It is difficult to see past a week when anything beyond that is so uncertain. There is so little certainty in the world right now. But of this I am certain: I miss my students. I hope I can return to the classroom soon.

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